okteiviakom | To the Cape Rouge, Sunday

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To the Cape Rouge, Sunday

Jennifer had taken off for Baltimore. If anyone had asked Octavia about the why and how, maybe even the when of it, she wouldn't have been able to say. Something in her had shut down at the sight of the island, the knowledge that they were no longer in Haven, and she only had one single shred of focus left, and one single goal to go with it:

Just herding Duke across the island, to the port, to the Rouge, to deliver him to Lucifer.

She hadn't said a word the entire way over.

But when they finally stepped onto the dock, with the ship just up ahead, she was almost running.

[ooc: For the two! Follows this.]

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"Just since yesterday."

Still enough to leave Lucifer terrified, but not-- long.

Lucifer stayed where he was. "I'll keep him save, Octavia," he said. "But I need you to be safe with us, as well."

Octavia felt like they'd been gone for a week.

Octavia also felt like she'd woken up an hour and a half ago and had then had everything fall apart on her in very fast succession.

Octavia felt like screaming.

Octavia said, "I want to go to my boat," before she even knew she'd thought it.

Duke let out a tight "don't" before he could stop himself.

He was probably never going to see Nathan again. Jennifer had been dead. Audrey was probably gone, obliterated by her -- her evil twin or whatever. He needed the people he had left near him right now. He needed to be able to see them, at least.

"You don't -- have to cuddle. Or whatever." Though he wanted her to. "Just please don't go right now."

In response to that, Octavia fell quiet.

She couldn't do more damage. And it sounded like what she wanted to do would do that.

"If it's solitude you want, I can put up a bedroll in one of the other rooms," Lucifer said quietly, his eyes darting to Duke to make sure that wasn't-- a terrible suggestion.

"But please stay a part of us."

Duke squeezed his eyes shut. He felt weak and he hated it.

"I know -- you're not okay." That was truth. Good. He kept talking, low and dry. "And you have to do what you have to do. I -- won't stop you. But I'd rather be able to see you. If it's alright."

"Okay."

There was no irony in her saying that, was there? It was just a quiet, tired word.

Because she couldn't, wouldn't hurt Duke.

Lucifer nodded, shallow.

He still hadn't a clue what had happened.

"Let's go inside, then."

He rose.

He hated how relieved that made him.

He offered her a shaky smile, shoulders tight, and headed for the door to the galley.

They were home. They were alive. He just had to stay focused on that.

Octavia got up, on legs that felt much more wobbly than they had when she'd sat down.

But that felt about right for this moment.

Lucifer's hand rose up instinctively to steady her, anyway.

Good. She needed someone and it didn't sound like she'd let Duke be that someone just now.

He'd just. Let go later. He could hold on a little longer.

He spotted a bowl of fruit on the galley counter and went for it, suddenly realizing he had no idea when they'd last eaten. "Anyone else want a banana?"

Octavia swayed away from Lucifer's attempt. She'd realize how it looked - how all of this looked - much, much later, probably. But right now she just couldn't bear it.

Didn't think she should be allowed it in the first place.

She followed Duke quietly into the galley.

Lucifer sucked in a loud breath through his nose, and just... tried not to take it personally.

He followed right behind them, his body unconsciously taking up more space, protecting them from whatever laid outside.

"I just ate," he said.

Duke nodded. He pulled two off the bunch and offered one to Octavia without looking fully at her. He felt absurdly like he was failing her.

Like he'd been constantly failing her since they'd woken up together on the Sanguine Moon some combination of this morning and two days ago that he couldn't wrap his head around right now.

Octavia took it - after needlessly brushing her fingers against the back of his hand, a little too specific of a touch to be accidental.

Even if she also wasn't looking at anyone much as she began to peel the banana.

"Do we want to sit?" Lucifer asked. "Or sleep? Or talk? I assume not talk."

Any relief Duke felt at that deliberate brush of fingers washed away again at the thought of having to explain to Lucifer what had happened.

What he’d done.

Lucifer had a right to know, though. They were going to need to be careful again, about blood. And who knew how all the awakened troubles worked.

“I’m troubled again,” he said. Staring down at his banana rather than looking at either of them. “There was — a situation. I was our best option.”

Octavia's hands stilled. Froze, at the thought of having to explain what had happened.

What she hadn't managed to do.

Lucifer had offered an out so why was Duke talking?

Her mouth felt glued shut, because it was the only way she could keep from screaming. You were never the best option!

Lucifer stared, too.

When he finally found his voice, what came out was, "Duke, you should never be an option."

"Yeah, well. Surprise. Haven is fucked up."

Still dry. Still spare. A hell of a lot more bitter, now.

"I chose this. It was my idea. No one else gets the blame, got it?"

And he probably thought that saying that would actually do something. Mean something.

Octavia set her banana aside (they couldn't just let her eat? she hadn't felt hungry in the first place and now it felt impossible) and turned on her heel to head into the bedroom.

"You absolute bloody fool."

She'd headed inside, not out. Lucifer could afford to focus on Duke for the moment.

"How many times?" he said. "How many times have we had this conversation? How many more times do we have to have it until you've gone off and gotten yourself killed?!"

Duke watched Octavia go. He definitely should have felt something about her walking away, but more and more, he just felt empty.

He turned back to Lucifer.

“I’m not the one who gets killed.” Soft. Flat. “I’m the one who does the killing.”

He’d barely thought about Ben not for a few hours at least. There’d been too much else to think about than to worry about the man he’d essentially martyred.

Lucifer felt a real and violent urge to slap Duke upside the head for that comment. He refrained.

"You're the one who loses a little more of himself every bloody time anyone makes you use your trouble," he said flatly. "There's a limit to that, Duke!"

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