The Cape Rouge, Later Friday Afternoon

[okteiviakom]

Octavia had urged Lucifer to fly Duke back to the boat. Something about safety, and security, and a defendable spot that was closed off and sort of separate from the rest of the island --

So in one word: control. Which Octavia was grasping for, had been grasping for from just about the second she'd laid eyes on Mara at Selkie Peak. Something she'd thought she'd had, with the portal idea, only to immediately find out how wrong she'd been.

Making Lucifer get Duke home as soon as possible had been another flaily attempt at it.

Of course, as Octavia had come to realize very soon after, it meant she'd had to let both of them out of her sight. She didn't know if Duke had come to yet. Didn't know anything, except that this was the fastest she'd ever crossed the island, trying to race an angel back to port.

Her heart was thumping like thunder in her ears and her lungs ached when she burst onto, then into the Cape Rouge.

And yet: "Lucifer! Is he still out?"

[ooc: For the two modded with permission! Follows this. Note to squirrels: That Octavia and Lucifer got Duke back to the boat is fine for broadcast, everything else NFB pls and thank you!]

Comments

[my_own_advocate]

Duke's face was pressed to his face. Octavia was looking at him.

Lucifer lingered in the entranceway, unseen, his expression filling with a bottomless exhaustion, then pain, then a sense of soul-deep worthlessness, before finally smoothing over into something even.

Something he'd been perfecting for much longer than they'd been alive.

He walked to them. Squatted.

"You should get some rest," he said.

[betterthanaplan]

Lucifer had come out, too. Lucifer, who Duke thought was tired of having to take care of him. Lucifer, who Duke was convinced thought he did this on purpose.

Duke had to get his shit together.

He grit his teeth, sucking in a breath.

He didn't get up. Not yet. Not until he was done crying.

[okteiviakom]

Octavia's free hand found... some part of Lucifer. His knee. She wasn't looking.

Her other hand slid up along Duke's back until it found the hand that was in his hair. Rubbed over it, tried to get it to loosen up.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer patted her hand, then gently nudged it aside. As far as he could tell, Duke wasn't going to get his shit together. Not right now, and likely not for the next few hours.

So he moved forward, and tried to scoop the man up off the floor, into his arms.

[betterthanaplan]

Shit.

Duke jerked, pulling away. "Don't." It came out choked. "Don't -- you don't want to --"

[okteiviakom]

Octavia drew both her hands away onto her lap, and just sat back.

Waited to see how the next minute would play out without her involvement.

[my_own_advocate]

"Pick you up and take you to bed? I absolutely do want to do that," Lucifer said. He wasn't so desperate to go chasing after Duke, but his arms were still extended, his eyebrows raised.

[betterthanaplan]

He was still going to pretend, was he.

Duke forced himself to uncurl, though he still kept his eyes on the floor, rather than looking at either of them.

"I'm not going to be a burden."

[okteiviakom]

Never mind, then.

Octavia's voice was as flat as it had been for while now:

"He doesn't think you're a burden."

[my_own_advocate]

"She is right, I don't," Lucifer said flatly. "In fact, if you do not stop shadowboxing with the insecurities in your own head and let me take you to bed and take care of you right now so I can stop feeling bloody useless, I will actually walk away, you stubborn idiot."

[betterthanaplan]

Duke had grown up alone. Literally alone. There were cracks -- fault lines -- in his head and heart and the argument with Lucifer had set his entire being into an earthquake.

And it hadn't exactly been that stable before.

Part of him wanted to yell some more. To tell Lucifer to stop telling him how to be. But that threat, that Lucifer would walk out --

He'd been half convinced that had already happened.

He gagged faintly, but held still, cramped and shaking, and waited.

[okteiviakom]

Octavia looked to Lucifer.

Waited, too.

[my_own_advocate]

And Lucifer had spent his childhood at the mercy of a Father who threw around the word 'love' like it meant something, insisted he was acting for his children's own good, and yet never actually supplied what they needed.

After over a year-- years-- of sometimes shouting, sometimes asking, sometimes begging Duke to stop being so rash with his life, to talk to Lucifer about pains they had in common, of Duke offering 'I love you's and 'what do you need's when all Lucifer wanted was for the future to stop feeling like it was crumbling under his feet, to feel like he genuinely mattered enough to--

...

He wasn't thinking about that right now. He just scooped Duke up and got to his feet, walking Duke into the bedroom.

Couldn't stand to see Duke so broken, so he had to do something.

[betterthanaplan]

Duke would give almost anything to be less broken. But he honestly didn't understand what was so wrong with him wanting to help everyone.

(Danny had tried, once upon a time. To teach him about boundaries. It hadn't really stuck, no.)

Audrey was gone. Who knew what had happened to Nathan, to Gloria, to Dwight with Mara running amuck in Haven. He couldn't lose anyone else. He couldn't.

"I'm sorry," he muttered. "Don't leave."

[okteiviakom]

Octavia...

Should probably also get off the floor, here, sometime soon.

She wasn't doing that yet. She watched Lucifer pick Duke up, watched him carry him.

She thought about the pots outside again, whether she wanted to or not.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer wasn't sure there was much he could do for Octavia right now. But he'd had a plan, to pick Duke up and put him to sleep, and then see what he little he could do until she came out of this by herself, and then crawl into a corner to wallow in feeling unloved (unlovable) for a while longer.

But Duke had to go and ruin it by speaking.

"I won't," he said, gruff and to the point. He set Duke down on the bed.

He didn't leave to go check on Octavia and do his wallowing, though. He climbed on it, slinging his arm around Duke's waist the moment he could.

[betterthanaplan]

He could go get Octavia. If he told Duke that was what he was doing. Duke wasn't in a place where he could say that, though.

The only thing he could do right now was lie where Lucifer had put him and try not to shake apart.

[okteiviakom]

Octavia couldn't really see them anymore, from the angle of where she was sitting.

Slowly, she got up onto her feet again.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer kicked at the sheets until they were far enough down that he could actually pull them up over the two of them.

Then he slid his leg between Duke's. Put his head down on the pillow.

At least he didn't feel quite as useless.

[betterthanaplan]

Duke wouldn't understand how Lucifer could feel useless. He was staying. That was everything.

Even as Duke shook. Even as he cried for someone Lucifer hated. Even as he pulled at his hair like hanging onto that would help him hang onto all he various pieces of himself that tried to fall off or float away.

"Thank you," he said, soft and hoarse. And "I'm sorry." And when those felt like they weren't enough: "You're people. You are. You're people."

[okteiviakom]

Octavia stood still for a moment.

Then she moved, towards the bedroom. But not into the bedroom, no. She sat down right by the door, outside, her back against the wall, legs crossed. Like she was sitting guard.

She'd done her part, right? This was all that was left.

[my_own_advocate]

"It's all right," Lucifer found himself saying in turn, and, "I love you," and, "You're not a burden, you are not."

Wanting to call for Octavia, too. Scared to break the moment.

[betterthanaplan]

Slowly, much too slowly, the shaking slowed.

And Duke noticed someone was missing.

"Octavia?" he asked.

[okteiviakom]

"Here," Octavia replied, in that same toneless rasp from before.

A short pause.

"Not coming."

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer swallowed.

He looked over his shoulder.

"What do you need?" he called.