The Cape Rouge, Tuesday... Noon?

[okteiviakom]

Right, to recap: Octavia's weekend had been replaced by one very long day. On Sunday, she and Duke had landed back in Fandom, and she'd failed to sleep much during the night, leading to her then passing out for most of the day, instead. And then she'd gone out to the Nest, gotten drunk, come back to the boat, and failed to fall asleep properly again until it had already been close to Tuesday morning.

And now that she had finally woken up again, she had no concept of what time it was, anymore.

But she knew her head hurt, and she felt nauseous and a little jittery. All of which felt like... oddly grounding things, after the past couple of days. Maybe it was the way her body finally felt fully as awful as the rest of her already had.

Anyway, she was keeping a close proximity to walls as she made her way out of the bedroom, finally, and towards the galley. Just in case she needed the support.

[ooc: Open!]

Comments

[okteiviakom]

"I failed you," Octavia said, somewhere in the middle of that. Barely more than a breath, against the edge of the glass she wasn't actually taking a sip from. "You, Lucifer."

[my_own_advocate]

"No," Lucifer said. "He failed us."

Oh, he thought. He was still angry after all.

[okteiviakom]

That was one way to get Octavia to actually look at him. The terrified note was still there, but now there was confusion, too.

"What?" she asked, weakly.

[my_own_advocate]

"How many times have we asked him not to give in to whatever madness Haven asked of him?" Lucifer asked. "How many arguments? How many desperate--" he waved a hand, "--wild goose chases through Maine because we had to solve some issue that didn't need to be an issue if he didn't believe, on some level, that it's his job to save the world? To save people who don't deserve saving? How many times has he forced us to make the choice to give him up?"

[okteiviakom]

This seemed wrong. All of this seemed wrong, like Lucifer was angry at the wrong person.

Guess her guilt wasn't ready to listen to reason.

Octavia stared at him, helpless.

[my_own_advocate]

"And now he has you feeling guilty," Lucifer said, a little sad, a lot exasperated, "because you couldn't convince him not to be a hero. That's madness, Octavia."

[okteiviakom]

"I could've done something," Octavia whispered. Patently untrue, of course, but it felt true to her.

Wasn't that the lesson of the bunker? If she just gave enough of herself away, something else would be spared?

[my_own_advocate]

"The only thing anyone could have done was either knock him out, or kill the bloody infant, or both," Lucifer said. "Which he would have resented, and he would probably run off and get himself even further into Haven's clutches."

He shook his head. "You did what you could," he said. "We just don't have any control here. That's the bloody terror of it, isn't it? It's all in his hands, and he's just happily flushing it down the toilet."

[okteiviakom]

The expression on Octavia's face was beginning to distort, to twist.

Into something pained.

[my_own_advocate]

And Lucifer saw it, and it cut through his tirade.

He sighed. Reached for a drink.

[okteiviakom]

Octavia hunched a little. It was the best attempt at curling into a ball currently at her disposal.

At least she also managed to take another sip of water?

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer blew out a breath.

"I'm sorry, darling," he said.

He reached out to put his hand on hers. "It's the screaming into the void that feels the worst. To me, at least."

[okteiviakom]

Octavia said nothing. Couldn't find the proper response, or... any.

But she put the water down so she could cover his hand with that one. Make them that much more intertwined.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer squeezed her hand.

He fell silent.

[okteiviakom]

So did Octavia.

Maybe she needed more time before she could properly talk about any of it. But at least she'd fixed whatever erroneous horrible thing he'd thought about her, even if she hadn't been able to convince to see the correct one.