Lucifer's Mansion, Saturday Night

[okteiviakom]

Yesterday, there'd been shopping. And today, there was...

Okay, Octavia was still not the most comfortable using words like 'date night'.

But it was probably a date night. She was even wearing a sleek black blouse with her black jeans, in an approximation of something Lucifer might like to see.

There'd also been a nice little meal, just now. And Octavia had even allowed herself a small glass of wine to go with it, the last of which she was making her way through now that they were cuddled up on the couch, still downstairs.

A little moment of rest before dessert, so to speak.

"That was delicious," she told Lucifer, her head tilted against his shoulder. "But it usually is."

[ooc: For that guy I modded, and NSFW-bound.]

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[my_own_advocate]

"Trust me," Lucifer murmured. "I understand."

Of all people. That had been their way for so long now.

[okteiviakom]

"I know."

She was saying that a lot, but oh well.

"So I shouldn't be surprised."

[my_own_advocate]

"It's easy," Lucifer said slowly, "To get rather wrapped up in your own head about that kind of thing."

[okteiviakom]

Octavia tried for wry, and almost hit it. "That is why I'm in therapy, yeah."

But she didn't actually talk about this part there, did she?

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer snorted. "I suppose so." Beat. "You talk about our sex life in therapy?"

He wasn't judging! Just curious.

[okteiviakom]

"... No." A beat. "Not really?"

Not because she wouldn't - she didn't really have much of a sense of shame around her sexuality, after all - but because it hadn't really come up.

Because she had so much other shit to wade through, twice a week.

[my_own_advocate]

"Sorry," Lucifer said. "It merely sounded like it for a moment."

[okteiviakom]

"Our sex life doesn't depress me," Octavia muttered, nuzzling his chest.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer laughed softly. "I would hope not."

[okteiviakom]

"Also it just hasn't come up."

So far.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer pressed a kiss against her temple. "Mhm."

[okteiviakom]

Octavia sighed quietly. "I have a lot of shit, Lucifer."

He already knew that, Tavi. You just almost cried on him over it, for one thing.

[my_own_advocate]

"I wasn't judging," Lucifer pointed out. "Or saying you should."

[okteiviakom]

"And I wasn't saying you were saying that," Octavia muttered, in turn.

Just... circling back to what she'd said about therapy in the first place.

[my_own_advocate]

Lucifer slid his fingers along her cheek. "Have you talked about what remains of that side of you?"

Because Lucifer could still summon his Devil face at will.

[okteiviakom]

The silence stretched on just a little too long.

"Not really," she admitted, finally.

[my_own_advocate]

"Perhaps you should," Lucifer said quietly.

He kissed her cheek again.

"I still have my Devil face," he said. "It's... a part of me."

[okteiviakom]

"But isn't that something you gave yourself?" Octavia murmured. She was keeping her eyes down, now. "Whether you wanted to or not."

[my_own_advocate]

"Because of how I felt for a very long time in my life," Lucifer said quietly.

[okteiviakom]

"Why hasn't it gone away?"

It felt like a stupid question as soon as it was out of her mouth, but it was there now, and she wasn't pulling it back.

[my_own_advocate]

"I... suppose you can't erase a part of yourself so easily," Lucifer said. "You can... make something better of it, move past it, but... a little bit of it will always be there."

[okteiviakom]

"Yeah, but I think people expect something different," Octavia murmured, trying to nuzzle at his chest again. "Like you could just carve away a part of you."

A pause.

"Or at least they want you to let them think you've done it."

[my_own_advocate]

"Well," Lucifer said, his fingers running over her hair. "We can't. So I think... it may be better. To turn that into something good."

[okteiviakom]

"Here," Octavia murmured.

Between them, where it was safe.

[my_own_advocate]

"Yes," Lucifer said. He drew a little circle against her skin. "We can do this again," he said. "Have dinner, come up here, get undressed... and you can be whatever version of the Red Queen is still in you, until you're done or someone uses the safeword."